When enough is enough

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(2) Ashlee Simpson
After three seasons of dingbat doozies broadcast on MTV for the world to see, to say nothing of those irritating Proactiv testimonials, you'd think Jessica would be the Simpson most ripe for derision.

Somehow, Ashlee has passed her on the HOV lane to humiliation.

Ashlee Simpson
Donald Weber / Getty Images
Ashlee Simpson performs in June during the MuchMusic Video Awards in Toronto. Why doesn't she ever quite look comfortable on stage?

There are the obvious moments, like her Orange Bowl performance so bad that you weren't sure whether to sympathize or just puncture your own eardrums with an icepick. Or her lip-synch goof on "Saturday Night Live" that daddy Joe tried to pass off with the curious explanation that poor Ashlee was croaking her way through a bout of acid reflux and would never, ever do such a thing otherwise. (Even Lorne Michaels cast a wagging finger on the whole affair.)

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No, the problem is that we just can't figure out why her career even exists, aside from the fact that she has a famous sister and a very, very ambitious father who seems to rather enjoy the whole music-impresario bit. Her own short-lived MTV show didn't quite answer the question.

Aside from the fact that her music is the sort of formless pop-rock that makes our skin crawl, she's had so many bizarre missteps that it's a feat of nature her career hasn't tanked. Even some of the photos on her official site make the poor girl look like she ate a burrito that didn't sit right. At this point, her best shot might be a mid-level acting career; her "7th Heaven" work hints that she might have some potential.

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Maybe the whole Simpson clan is smarter than we think. But if Ashlee hopes to have her fame last beyond this year's candy-corn clearance sale at Wal-Mart (and we're not saying it should, mind you) she'd better find some can't-miss hits and some management that avoids the sort of high-profile pitfalls that are now the emblems of her career. And, um ... Hey Joe, where you goin' with that contract in your hand?

Train wreck factor: 7 in 10.

Could take a lesson from: Avril Lavigne. Love her, hate her; you can't deny she's got some legitimate rock cred — and she doesn't blame the band when things go wrong.

CONTINUED: The Olsen twins

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