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Jackson — They're rolling up cables and wires in Santa Maria.  They're rolling bandages for the guest-bookers from the TV talk shows.  And Michael Jackson is rolling up new records for weirdest conduct in the shortest period of time since being acquitted.  Jackson has issued a statement tonight on his website.  It can best be described as a "Victory Video."  The video compares the acquittal to historical events with no less significance than the birth of Martin Luther King Junior and the release of Nelson Mandela.  But, the latest report on Jackson says he's off-line.  He is still at Neverland Ranch where, as his brothers Jermaine and Tito told us exclusively last night, he continues to rest.  There have, as of yet, been no moonwalks, no ice-cream socials, not even a full-on wave.

Death at Disney — By all accounts, little Daudi Bamuwamye, his parents and the people running the ride did everything they were supposed to do, before letting him get on the "Mission: Space" ride at Disneyworld.  And then he died.  He was taller than the 44-inch minimum requirement, but Daudi was four-years-old.  Now this question remains: Are there dangers in such rides that the most responsible parents, and the most vigilant park operators, don't know about?  The child died Monday, after passing out during the ride which uses centrifugal force to simulate twice the normal effects of gravity.  It's supposed to create the illusion of a rocket launch from Earth to Mars.  The initial coroner's report is back and it shows "no evidence of trauma" and says "further testing will be required." 

Gitmo — Gitmo — apparently, it's a nice place to visit, and you don't have a choice whether or not to live there.  First, today, the Secretary of Defense became just the latest in a series of defenders of Gitmo to suggest that releasing detainees is a bad idea, because some of those previously released have come back to haunt us on the battlefield.  The Vice President also noted that yesterday.  Today, Senator John McCain, and Majority Leader Bill Frist acknowledged the facility had instigated a P.R. issue for the U.S.  But Frist insisted, "To cut and run because of image problems is the wrong, wrong thing to do."  Especially considering it turns out that there's an all-you-can-eat buffet there.  Representative Duncan Hunter of California says prisoners are eating glazed chicken and lemon-baked fish.  He says people who want to close the place — including Republican Senators — are buying into a "myth" that there is abuse.  There's no abuse. There's just... lemon-fish.

Lucky landings — In short, they both looked like unmitigated disasters.  A plane crashed into a Fort Lauderdale neighborhood and sight-seeing helicopter crashed into the East River, near Wall Street in New York City.  Between them, 11 people were aboard and all survived.  The chopper went into the East River, shortly after taking off from the Wall Street heliport in lower Manhattan.  But both the pilot and the seven passengers were quickly rescued because police harbor units were already nearby, conducting a drill.  By the time rescuers got there, four passengers were on top of the chopper, the other three in the water.  All but one of those rescued were able to walk after the accident, six are in stable condition, one in critical but stable condition....As for that plane in Fort Lauderdale, the landing was no doubt hard, but no less miraculous.  What the pilots managed to do with a WWII era cargo plane could almost stand as a survival guide for how to crash successfully.

Porn queen meets Bush — Today, when politics meet porn, it's not in a nickname but in the flesh.  Mary Carey, the so-called "adult actress" who was among the dozens who ran for Governor of California two years ago, is at the President's Dinner tonight.  The Republican Party fund-raising event features none other than the President of the United States.  A spokesman for the co-hosts of the dinner, the National Republican Congressional Committee, said of the porn star and her boss, "their money was donated to the NRCC. The NRCC's job is to elect Republicans. We'll take that money and use it to elect more Republicans."  No comment was made on moral values.

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