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It’s your funeral …

In death, as in life, many choose to have it their way

Image: Memorial rocket
www.SpaceServicesInc.com
Onlookers await the launch of a rocket that carried cremated remains into orbit on Sept. 21, 2001.  Space Services Inc. plans to launch its fifth memorial flight this summer amid a growing trend in personalized funerals.
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By Josh Belzman
Producer
msnbc.com
updated 12:51 a.m. ET June 13, 2005

Josh Belzman
Producer

E-mail
Michael Lucas says anyone who knew his father would understand why he chose to honor his life with a uniquely celestial memorial.

“I decided to put dad up into space,” said Lucas, a 47-year-old photo technician and video producer from Sunland, Calif.

Michael’s father, John Meredyth Lucas, was a true space buff, and his years in Hollywood as a writer and producer included several seasons working on the original “Star Trek” series with the show’s creator, Gene Roddenberry. “(Dad) just adored the space program and anything to do with space,” Michael said.

It’s that close connection to the stars that prompted Michael Lucas to turn to Space Services Inc. to honor his father after his death in 2002. The Houston-based company specializes in commercial space ventures, including launching cremated remains into orbit. The inaugural “memorial flight” in 1997 carried aloft several grams of Roddenberry’s ashes. The fifth flight, which will carry the cremated remains of John Lucas and 124 others, is scheduled for liftoff sometime in July.

“We like to say we’re putting dad up into space for one last story with Gene,” Michael said.

A fitting tribute
From funeral rockets to mountaintop memorials, Americans are moving toward more colorful, personalized ways to say goodbye to loved ones. Such services often include “comfort” music, favorite foods, photographs and other mementos that celebrate the individuality of the dead. Grieving families also are holding theme receptions and having cremated remains embedded in reefs or compressed into gemstones.

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“A lot of this is being driven by baby boomers,” said Fay Spano, a spokesperson with the National Funeral Directors Association. “They want things their own way, to create their own events.”

A survey commissioned by NFDA found that 62 percent of those wanting a funeral service preferred some form of personalization.

Ashes to ashes
Bolstering the trend, and perhaps as a result of it, the number of people choosing cremation is increasing, according to the Cremation Association of North America.

While cremation remains largely taboo in the Bible Belt — only about 5 percent of the dead in the region are cremated — in senior havens such as Florida and the Southwest, cremation rates are nearing 50 percent, according to the association's executive director, Jack Springer.

“People are dying older and farther away from their families,” he said. “Cremation is now considered a normal way of disposing of a body. It’s an individual choice and arranging a cremation, in the minds of a lot of people, is simpler.”

Springer’s association projects that nearly 43 percent of Americans will choose cremation over burial by 2025.

Celebrating in Margaritaville
Whether their clients are arranging an ash-scattering ceremony or a burial, funeral directors are increasingly encouraging families to give services a personal touch, said Kurt Soffe, a funeral home director in the Salt Lake City area.

Image: Cowboy coffin
cowboyslastride.com
Cowboy’s Last Ride Co. builds coffins befitting a true Western lifestyle.

“Through personalized tributes, families can feel a greater sense of closeness to their loved ones, rather than hold a cookie-cutter funeral,” he said. “A personalized memorial gives them license to talk about the life of the person they’ve lost.”

When Utah corrections officer Dan Pracht died in April 2004, Soffe’s funeral home helped create a service designed to pay tribute to Pracht's two great passions. Two days of memorials were split between a motorcycle procession featuring nearly 200 Harleys and a Jimmy Buffet-themed reception.

Blasted from a cannon
“These are ideas that come from meeting with the family,” Soffe said. “Just through discussion and listening together, we can say, ‘Let’s try this.’”

Gonzo journalist Hunter S. Thompson will get his wish when his family shoots his ashes from a 150-foot cannon in Aspen, Colo., during an Aug. 20 service that will mark six months since he killed himself. The service also will include speeches and live entertainment.


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