10 ways to get an upgrade

By James Wysong

Travel columnist

updated 5:30 p.m. ET June 28, 2005

You see them crowding the airport check-in counter, looking for a sign. Waiting for an announcement.

They are business travelers, frequent fliers, off-duty employees, and even first-timers. They are the last ones to board, but the first ones to petition for an available seat up front.

Every flight has its share of upgrade candidates. But there are usually more candidates than first-class seats, and as a result, some of those passengers become very upset. (If you’re one of those people, here’s a little something to ponder: If the airlines upgraded everyone, how would they make any money?)

Still, the upgrade brigade persists, even after the last person has boarded.

Among the arguments I’ve heard for reassigning a passenger to a premium seat: “My reading light doesn’t work, my seat doesn’t recline, I smell smoke, I have asthma, diarrhea, epilepsy, heart condition. I am too tall, fat, old. I lost my boarding card, and the ground agent said I could take a seat anywhere. I hate this airline, love this airline, I work for another airline, I am an employee for this airline. My sister’s ex-boyfriend’s doctor’s cousin’s daughter used to fly for this airline.”

They never work. Well, almost never.

One time a passenger had a heart attack, and we had a fairly empty first-class section. We moved him up there until we landed. But that’s a pretty tough way to get more legroom.

I have had passengers shake my hand upon boarding and slip me twenties, fifties and even hundred dollar bills asking me to “see what I can do for them.” I even had a lady promise to induct me into the mile high club if I got her a higher-class seat.

It’s not that the flight attendants don’t want to upgrade you, it’s just plain and simple: we can’t. Our rules of conduct state specifically that upgrading (without permission from a supervisor on the ground or in emergencies, from the captain) is an offense punishable by immediate discharge.

It’s a firm rule, with no room for negotiation or interpretation.

Keep this in mind: you could have an airline employee eating right out of your hand, but when the magic word or implication of an upgrade arises, an alarm bell goes off in his head which discredits everything you have said up to that point. You’ve been made. We call it our BS alert.

Here are some factors that will increase your chances of getting an upgrade:

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