Boobs and boors in 'Playboy: The Mansion'

Playing the M-for-Mature rated "Playboy: The Mansion" video game is like perusing the magazine for the articles. 

The premise sounds promising enough. Take control of Hugh Hefner, the twin-dating septuagenarian, and publish a gentleman's magazine while living the "Playboy" life.

This is less fun than it sounds. Buying shag rugs and raising herds of peacocks may mean the ultimate in retro-coolness in L.A., but in a game they are as "sexy" as Tom Arnold, who I am sorry to report, also makes an appearance in this game.

Appearances by C-grade celebrities aside, "Playboy: The Mansion" boasts a level of game play sophistication above the recent flood of sex-related titles. That's not saying much given the competition -- I'm talking to you, "The Guy Game" -- but in between a moderately successful business simulation and gobs of second-rate "Sims 2"-style socializing are moments that prove to be as memorable as they are disturbing.

Playboy: The Mansion Rating: M-for-Mature, 17+ Platform: PC, Sony PlayStation 2; Xbox Price: $39.99 (PC) $49.95 (PS2 and Xbox)

Credit the makers for dedicating the more interesting part of the game to the second most common lie in the skin trade after the "I'm stripping for college tuition" line: "I subscribe to Playboy for the articles."

Players assign writers to pen articles, essays and interviews on a variety of topics from politics to the arts. An accessible screen projects how well an upcoming issue can meet potential readers in certain demographics based on its content.  

The challenge lies in maximizing content relevancy and profit. Players can tweak the cover price and ad ratio, dabble with issues devoted to a specific theme -- "The Sports Issue!" -- and track down elusive celebrities for an interview.

Done a couple times, the interactive editor function can be engaging, but as a game driving engine it's about as exciting as a luke warm hot tub.

Speaking of hot tubs ...

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