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Lohan ‘looking for love’ in new mock video
Actress takes on break-up and more faults with spoof personal ad
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LOS ANGELES - Lindsay Lohan is hoping everyone can have a good laugh — at her expense.
The actress, who has been on a relationship rollercoaster with on-again/off-again girlfriend Samantha Ronson over the last few weeks, has made a video for FunnyOrDie.com where she jokes about trying to find a new girlfriend — or boyfriend.
“Hi my name is Lindsay and I’m searching for love,” she says in a video spoof of an eHarmony commercial on the comedy Web site. “I’m recently single ... I think. And, I’m looking for someone I can spend the rest of my life with — or at least the rest of my probation with.”
Lohan then runs down her personal highlights, saying, “I’m an actress, a singer, an entrepreneur and I have single handedly kept 90 percent of all gossip Web sites in business.”
She says her personality is “creative, a bit of a night owl, a workaholic, a shopaholic — and according to the state of California an alcoholic ... as well as a threat to all security guards, if they work at hotels.”
She next takes on the gossip surrounding her finances.
“To put all those rumors to rest, I am not broke. I actually have over $400 dollars in the bank ... and 20,000 Marlboro miles, which I’m very proud of,” she jokes.
As for who Lohan is looking for in a “mate,” she said she hopes to find someone “who likes a night out on the town, as long as he or she is driving of course, likes ankle-monitoring bracelets and doesn’t have family members quick to issue restraining orders.
“The perfect mate loves long walks on the beach, car chases on the PCH, antiquing and passing out in Cadillac Escalades,” Lohan continued. “So, if you think you can handle a redhead with a little bit of sass, and by that I mean a redhead that’s crazy ... I mean don’t pretend like you don’t know me, we’ve all read about it! We’ll crash a few parties, a car or two, but at the end of the day, I promise you, I never lose my Google hits — just my underwear.”
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