‘Dancing’ features three-way tie for first

“We’re back with another week of dramatic injuries!” said co-host Samantha Harris breathlessly, and thus began the third performance show of this year’s “Dancing With The Stars.” In fact, it was the least injury-plagued episode yet, not that this should slow the wound-promoting juggernaut.

First up was Denise Richards, who had tentatively improved last week, but who bombed with her samba, even after her partner, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, showed up in a pink dress to loosen her up. Denise lacks rhythm and grace, and she always — as judge Carrie-Ann Inaba pointed out — looks terrified, like she’s taking a test she hasn’t studied for. Their samba was plodding and lifeless, and received only 16 points. For the third time out, that’s pretty bad. (For comparison, Cloris Leachman’s third performance last season earned a 15.)

Next up were Chuck Wicks and Julianne Hough doing a foxtrot. Chuck didn’t let Julianne dance all around him this time, but he still needs some work on his posture. He oddly gives the impression of having legs and arms that are about six inches longer than he thinks, and there’s a lack of fluidity that judge Len Goodman chalked up to not standing up straight. He and Julianne had reason to be happy with two 8s and a 7.

For someone who is supposed to be sexy, Playboy model Holly Madison produced an almost comically awkward samba, in which some of her movements looked a bit more funky chicken than Latin steamy. She missed steps, her feet pointed in the wrong direction, and the fact that two out of three judges complimented her chest didn’t bode well for her scores, which added up to a meager 17.

Viewers then learned what became of Steve-O, who survived last week even after injuring himself during rehearsal and winding up in the hospital. His partner, Lacey Schwimmer, vowed to make the foxtrot easy on him so he wouldn’t reinjure his back. (That Steve-O is a cautious fellow!) While he dropped a few steps, he demonstrated substantially more promise than anyone anticipated. His 15 points frankly seemed a little harsh, given that the steps he got right looked much better than Holly’s.

A good week for the athletes
One of last week’s surprises was an improved Lawrence Taylor, who faced the samba this week and said he was “stressing.” Much to his own shock, he found himself even sacrificing a golf game to rehearse. His performance wasn’t great, but for the first time, he showed a bit of the warm likability that has buoyed buff athletes in the past. The judges pointed out that he needs more hip action, then gave him 20 points, a decent showing for a guy who doesn’t seem to have arrived with fully operational joints.

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Gymnast Shawn Johnson continues to act her age, showing off the adorable Mark Ballas to her jealous friends via Webcam (wouldn’t you, at 17?) as she started to learn the foxtrot. Her specialty has not been smooth elegance, so she seemed more nervous than ever. She looked lovely, however, and her athleticism and flexibility gave the dance instant credibility that no one had yet demonstrated. Her 27 points were well deserved.

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The judges have been very impressed — perhaps a little too impressed — with obscure actor Gilles Marini, who has topped the judges’ scores for two straight weeks. The samba played directly to his sweet spot, which is the kind of overt sexuality that, after all, made him the tiniest bit “famous” in the “Sex And The City” movie to begin with. It was a good samba, though nothing special technique-wise, but it wasn’t surprising that he landed three 9s, just in deference to the overall effect.

Comedian David Alan Grier had a rough time last week, and he worked hard in practice to set up a “breakthrough performance” with his foxtrot. While it wasn’t exactly a “breakthrough,” it was certainly his best showing, and the first time that he looked comfortable doing his own dancing, instead of having partner Kym Johnson dance around him. While his timing was flawed and his footwork imperfect, there was a little nut of charm at the center of the dance, and he judges rewarded him with a much improved 24 points.

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