Shaky economy means ‘bye-bye baby’ for some

Stressful time to be pregnant
Without a doubt, in good economic times or bad, raising a child is an expensive proposition. According to “Expenditures on Children by Families,” an annual report put out by the U.S. Department of Agriculture, a middle-class family making more than $77,100 will spend nearly $300,000 raising a child from birth to age 17 — and that doesn’t even take into account college tuition or inflation.

Those who are already pregnant are feeling the pinch.

Michelle and Paul Anderson, two Seattle-based high-tech professionals, were delighted to learn they were pregnant with their first child earlier this year, until they both found themselves laid off from their jobs and paying out-of-pocket for health insurance.

Friends and relatives, cash-strapped themselves, haven’t been able to help with baby gifts as much as they anticipated. “Being pregnant makes this very stressful on both of us,” says Anderson. We have trouble sleeping and we worry all the time.”

Allison Francis, 28, a Phoenix-based mother of a 5-year-old, says she and her fiancé are waiting to have a second child due to the high cost of health insurance. “We were going to try next year, but we are thinking we may wait until 2010,” she says. “Our son is begging us for a brother or a sister, so it's hard to think of waiting too long.”

For some families, postponing may mean just delaying a few months. For others, it could mean they never have children, due to age-related declines in fertility. Dr. Alan Singer, a family therapist in Highland Park, N.J., and a parenting columnist at HomeNews Tribune, fears that some couples who delay pregnancy for too long might end up finding themselves dealing with infertility issues, which brings its own potential problems, such as the high financial burden, the risks of multiple births and related health complications.

“There are consequences to that decision to delay,” says Singer.

Another mouth to feed
However, some families say they are expanding regardless of the economic situation.

“Children are as expensive as you make them,” says Julie Cole, 37, a Toronto-based mom of five with number six on the way.  Between her old baby gear and hand-me-downs, she doesn’t envision one more mouth to feed breaking the bank. 

“We can afford the things we really want to afford,” she says. “Financial priorities are all relative. I can’t afford to be driving two new cars and go on international holiday, but I can afford another baby. This (recession) wouldn’t make or break my decision.”

And Beth Golden, a Scituate, Mass., mother of two, still plans to have a third child, despite her relatives admonishing her about the cost of college tuition. “I just feel that bringing a child into the world is much more important to me than thinking about financial responsibilities 18 years from now,” she says. “The joy a child brings to my life cannot amount to the value of anything else.”

Even if families intend to hold off, as the saying goes, the best laid plans often go astray.

Morgan points out that nearly 50 percent of pregnancies in the U.S. are “unintended.” “I would expect some fertility downturn, but the spigot will not be turned off,” he says. “People will continue to smoke, drink — and have sex.”

Melissa Schorr is a Boston-based freelancer who has written for the Wall Street Journal, the Boston Globe Magazine, Reuters Health, Working Mother, Self, GQ and People. She is the author of the young adult novel "Goy Crazy."

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