Tom Cruise laughable in ‘Valkyrie’

Courtney Hazlett The Scoop

MGM’s marketing team is working hard to convince audiences that their oft-delayed Tom Cruise vehicle “Valkyrie” is a thriller and not the chatfest “Lions for Lambs” was. But those who've gotten an early glimpse say not only is the film nowhere near as exciting as a thriller, but Cruise’s performance elicits uncomfortable and inappropriate laughs.

Among them: A scene where Cruise’s character, Claus Von Stauffenberg, is forced to give the infamous “Heil Hitler” salute. “It’s an unsettling scene but you almost start to laugh," the source says. "His character is resisting it but you never forget it’s Tom Cruise saying ‘Heil Hitler.’ It’s funny and shocking at the same time.”

Sources also described a scene where Cruise’s character Claus Von Stauffenberg removes a false eye. “It was disgusting,” said one person who saw the film. “It was like watching someone pluck their contacts out.”

“The film just isn’t a thriller at all” said one “Valkyrie” viewer. “It’s a bunch of white guys in Nazi uniforms. It’s too bad. And Tom doesn’t speak with a German accent — though they did add a voiceover of him speaking German to the beginning of the film. Still, it’s as if he could say ‘I complete you’ at any time. This is not his Oscar moment.”

Ellen to host variety show in Vegas
Rosie O’Donnell isn’t the only morning chat host (past or present) to get a variety show. Ellen DeGeneres will host the Ellen’s Even Bigger Really Big Show Nov. 20 at Caesars Palace.

“The first act we booked is a brother-sister ‘pole act’ — and apparently, Las Vegas is the only place you can get away with something like that,” says DeGeneres.

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And that’s not all. She jokes to In Touch, “I may be topless — which is potentially kind of exciting!”

But fear not — Ellen isn’t starring in a sequel to “Showgirls.” “It’s my humor, commenting on the absurdities of human behavior,” she says. “It’s not like I’m going to start cursing all of a sudden!”

Ashton and Demi’s sweet birthday soiree
Demi Moore had her 46th birthday Nov. 11 and to celebrate, Ashton Kutcher threw an intimate party at Dolce Enoteca, an Atlanta-based restaurant he invests in.

Moore is there filming “The Joneses” opposite David Duchovny, and according to Us Weekly, 20 non-celeb guests enjoyed dinner and dessert. As for the couple, they seemed happy as ever.

“They were cuddling and kissing all night,” a witness told Us. And it’s no secret that Kutcher is completely smitten with his wife of three years. “He’s in such awe of her,” a source tells Us. “He’s always telling her how beautiful she is and telling his friends how lucky he is.”

Courtney Hazlett delivers the Scoop Monday through Friday on msnbc.com.

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