Relationships and family reevaluated after 9/11

Name: Joan Ford
Age: 39
Hometown: Aliso Viejo, Calif.

I was set on never having children. I was happy and comfortable with my life and career. I believed I had enough meaning and purpose in my life without being "shackled" (so I thought) as a woman and person. Then Sept. 11th happened.

One morning, after another sleepless night with images of the victims running hauntingly through my head, it came to me. Life is so short. You never know what's going to happen. Life is difficult; no matter how much we want to believe that it will be easy, it never is and never will be. And life is without deep meaning if you can't share it with someone else.

My husband and I, although terrified, decided to "jump off the deep end" and have children. We didn't know if we were ready or not, but we felt that because of life's transitory state, it was one thing that we would regret doing if we allowed it to pass us by.

We began trying that October (a month after 9/11). I didn't get pregnant until the following August, and by that time, we were so afraid of not being fertile, that we were ready and overjoyed when it finally happened.

We had our first daughter on May 24, 2003. We had our second daughter on October 5, 2005.

The decision to have our children was the best decision we ever made. Yes, we have sleepless nights and trying moments. But we have a purpose and sense future that we didn't have before.

Having children brings you back to the basics, back to the essence of life, back to what's really important -- just as September 11th did -- but more than anything, children give you hope, which is something we all desperately need after 9/11.

***

Name: Katy McCarthy
Age: 46
Hometown: New York, N.Y.

I lived a block from the World Trade Center. I was in the subway underneath the WTC while it was all happening, only to emerge a little bit uptown by work to see the WTC on fire. Not clear or understanding what was happening I went to work to find out.

I never returned home to live in my apartment. I was unable to access my building until late October. Bought all new things and moved in with my current boyfriend in the West Village with no place else to go.

It cemented our relationship that was stuck in neutral – going through all that with him and having him there for me.

We decided to try and have a baby for fear of losing precious time in our life. I got pregnant at Christmas 2001 and our son, Luke Thomas, was born the following 9/12 by a scheduled c-section.

For medical reasons, I had to have a c-section and was given a choice of that week. So we settled on 9/12/2002 instead of 9/11.

It was life-altering and put everything into perspective. And we are still living in NYC -- with our almost-4-year-old son!

MORE FROM 9/11: SEVEN YEARS LATER

9/11: Seven Years Later Section Front

U.S. marks anniversary of 9/11 attacks   Video: At Ground Zero, rebuilding progress at last Field Notes: 'Ups and downs' for 9/11 Pentagon survivor Obama calls for renewal of 9/11 spirit of service UNC-Rutgers lone 9/11 sports event in N.Y. area Fears grow of terrorist with ‘an American face’ County of Flight 93 crash hopes for growth Adding voices to relics at 9/11 museum Know what 9/11's Bob Beckwith is doing now? Is it still too soon for jokes about Sept. 11? 9/11: Seven Years Later Section Front   Add 9/11: Seven Years Later headlines to your news reader: