When to tell the boss that you are pregnant

Next, make a list of key projects that must be done before you leave, and tell your boss what you'll realistically be able to finish. Provide him and the person handling your job with a list of your daily, weekly and quarterly assignments. Call any important clients or contacts to let them know you'll be out of the office on maternity leave, and point them to the interim contact. "That's a nice professional etiquette thing to do," says Ken Pinnock, director of human resources at the Mountain States Employers Council, an employer advocacy group. "It communicates to the employer that the person cares about what happens to the company."

If you do all this and notice your boss is restricting the types of projects you work on or has taken you off the partnership track, address it with him. In the best scenario, the boss is trying to make things easy on you (albeit unfairly). Document all of these changes and then say something to him. In most cases, it's a misunderstanding that will be rectified by your bringing it to his attention.

If it's a more serious situation, such as the boss making offhand comments about your pregnancy affecting your work, continue to document those instances. Also keep note of the change in assignments you're getting. First, go to your boss and ask if there's a problem with the quality of your work, says Pinnock. If it doesn't improve, bring all the examples to human resources. Discriminating against someone because they're pregnant is illegal, and most companies will handle the situation immediately.

In the last decade, a new workplace concept has been identified: Family rights discrimination, which means discriminating against an employee who serves as a caregiver to a family member. The number of cases filed against employers has increased 400 percent in the last decade, says Pinnock.

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It's an expensive issue that employers want to resolve outside the courts. Going above your boss' head to human resources is a difficult decision, but a necessary one if your career path is being negatively impacted.

It's tough to know how you'll feel about working once the baby is born, so consider all options. Before going on leave, find out if your company offers alternatives to working in the office full time. Examples include job-sharing, which allows two employees to share the responsibilities of one position, enabling both of them to work part-time. There's also telecommuting or returning to work on a staggered schedule, which allows the new mother to gradually increase her amount of time in the office. For instance, she might return to work three days weekly for about two months, and then increase to four days for two months, working back up to full time.

As for Stager's problem of employees touching her belly, lots of women have the same problem. Thenestbaby.com conducted an online poll and found that 80 percent of the women who took the survey had their stomachs touched; 65 percent said they hated it. "It's like you become pregnant and your body becomes public property," says Kate Ward, online director of thenestbaby.com.

So here's a note to all employees: Keep your hands off the baby bump.

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