J.Lo gives twins the diva treatment

She gave birth less than two weeks ago, but Jennifer Lopez already has diva-worthy digs set up for twins Max and Emme. With a color therapist, a masseuse and a private present suite, the babes won’t want for a thing, the Daily Mirror reports.

“Jennifer has gone all out to give the twins an amazing childhood,” an insider revealed to the paper. “She had the nursery painted a beautiful aquamarine and light blue — colors which are supposed to have intelligence boosting properties.”

Max and Emme occupy their own wing of Jennifer and Marc Anthony’s home, according to the Mirror’s source. It’s filled with luxury baby belongings, such as 600-thread-count Egyptian cotton crib linens and diamond-encrusted rattles. Oh, and even though they can’t use them yet, each tiny tot has a Shetland pony at the ready outside.

New presents are piling up, but not in wee ones’ wing. “The twins’ wing is totally sterile and all flowers and presents are stored in a separate room, so they don’t contaminate the babies’ area.” The insider added, “It may sound excessive but she’s only got her kids’ best interests at heart and wants to give them the start in life she never had.”

Paris fakes enlightenment

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Just days ago, Paris Hilton trolled around L.A. with a robed guru in tow. She bought self-help books at the Bodhi Tree Bookstore, and when prompted by her bearded pal, Paris gave a diamond necklace to a complete stranger. But now TMZ reports that the man who Paris claimed “really changed my life” is just another actor.

The celebutante’s publicity stunt cohort is actually Maxie Santillan, a character actor who boasts bit parts in “CSI,” “My Name is Earl” and “Pirates of the Caribbean.” (And don’t miss him as “Slimy Drunk” in the upcoming “Life is Hot in Cracktown!”)

Mariah’s not ready to be a mom
Hollywood’s baby boom is still in full swing, but Mariah Carey has no plans to join the bump-baring masses. The five-time Grammy winner told Yo on E! she’s just not ready for mommyhood.

“Obviously, having a kid is a commitment for life,” Mariah said in an excerpt of the interview in OK! “I really would have to be very, very positive that I was in a place where I could completely focus and put everything into the job of being someone’s mommy, because it’s hard enough to have a puppy.”

Dish on the fly
Though he hasn’t ruled out product endorsements all together, Simon Cowell won’t shill the little blue pill. “Last year my agent rang me and said, ‘You’ve been offered an incredibly big million-pound deal. It’s to be the face of Viagra.’” But the “American Idol” grump told Glamour (UK) he was not amused. “And I just said, ‘Sorry, but that has to be a f---ing insult.’” … Speaking to the Times of London, Eddie Izzard explained the addictive nature of stand-up. “If you do comedy — if you make people laugh — it releases serotonin in your brain,” the cross-dressing comedian said in an excerpt of the interview on PageSix.com. “People get addicted to that. Comedians become dealers. Audiences become junkies. It’s like salivating before a meal — there’s an expectation of a certain taste.”

Tabloid Tidbits is compiled by Ree Hines.

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