Six jeers for Six Flags

OPINION

By John Frenaye

Travel columnist

updated 12:18 p.m. ET July 27, 2007

John Frenaye Travel columnist • Profile • E-mail

A few weeks ago, I snuck off from work and played hooky with my kids. We gathered up my girlfriend and her kids and headed straight for that icon of American summer fun: the amusement park. Fortunately, I live in Annapolis, Md., and a Six Flags theme park is literally around the corner. We did have a fun day. We left tired, sunburned, wet and poor — all indicative of some fun, for sure. But this visit left me thinking.

Remember the old rivalry between the two rental car companies Hertz and Avis? Hertz was always crowing, "We're #1," while scrappy Avis told us, "We try harder." We loved Avis for that persistence; it kept us rooting for the little guy. Well, as I reflect on my day at Six Flags, I think that maybe they ought to heed Avis' advice and try a little harder.

Maybe it's not fair to compare Six Flags to the big kahuna, Disney's Magic Kingdom, but in many ways the parks are very similar. They both have Main Streets with shops and eateries that spread out before you when you walk in the gates. Both are laid out in a circular pattern. Both have added water parks in recent years, and while the rides at Six Flags are not of the caliber of those at Walt Disney World, both parks offer rides to thrill all ages. While Six Flags used to call its properties "amusement parks," now they are marketed as "theme parks" — I suspect to keep up with the Disneys — so I feel it is fair to compare the two operations.

1. Cost vs. value
When I travel, I look at both price and value. There's a big difference — don't fool yourself. With Disney, I know I am going to pay a hefty price, but I also know I am going to get value for that investment. When I discovered that Six Flags cost nearly the same as Disney, I expected the value to be close, too. Not the same experience, to be sure — after all, no one seems to do it like Disney — but close. Without any discounts or coupons, it costs only $17 more to walk into the Magic Kingdom ($67 admission) than into the Six Flags in Bowie, Md. ($50 admission). That gap narrows to $12 when you figure that it costs $5 more to park at Six Flags. But any similarity between these two theme parks ends at the price of admission.

2. Food service
The food at Six Flags was mediocre (that's also true at Disney), but it was the service that really hit the floor. The lines were long almost everywhere we went. The concept of a "lunch rush" was lost on the employees, as we waited nearly 20 minutes for burgers at noon (and these were pre-wrapped burgers, folks, not cooked to order on the grill). To save some money, we purchased a "free refill souvenir cup" for $18 that apparently had some fine print somewhere that indicated that refills were free — but only after you paid an additional $2 to refill it! Plus, it was valid only at certain locations — not "all over" as the sign indicated. Truth in advertising?

3. Cleanliness

Slide show   Disneyland through the years “The Happiest Place on Earth” has delivered fun for young and old alike for more than five decades. more photos

The park was not really clean. Trash cans were overflowing. The tables at the restaurants were not wiped down and sometimes they were not even cleared (and I do not blame the employees for this — some customers can be pigs). There were piles of cardboard boxes throughout the park; they had once held stuffed animals and other arcade prizes, but now they were just lying around empty. It seems no one cared about the mess. Or maybe they were waiting for Tinkerbell to come in after the park closed and clean it all up.

4. The rides
The rides were good. While certainly not on the scale of Disney, they thrilled everyone in our group. Even I, the wimp (as my kids like to say), ventured on several thrill rides and roller coasters. I even got front spot on the Superman roller coaster which all of my kids wimped out on themselves! But I passed on the bungee jumping ride. If I am going to die bungee jumping, it is going to be someplace a little more exotic than on the concrete at Six Flags, Bowie. The ride operators all seemed bored. Well, OK, it is probably boring work, but it is also is your job, so perk up for heaven's sake.

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