A clean white template with gray text boxes, this profile is easy to read and fairly simple navigate. This Internet superstar is well-connected within the various social networks, and you can even buy Ron Paul merchandise from the candidates Café Press store (thongs, however, are not available.) Dr. Paul’s MySpace player rocks songs about Dr. Paul written by one of his top friends, Steve Dore.

Helen: Not a bad profile, though Ron would do well to replace his profile photo with something that doesn’t resemble Madame Tussaud's Dr. Ron Paul. Further, posting the video from his “Daily Show” appearance anywhere but the very top of the page is really dropping the ball because Dr. Ron, no matter how big your fanbase, it doesn’t touch John Stewarts

Ree: Another giant MySpace mistake: Where are his interests? Pop culture matters. As MySpace voters we desperately want, nay, need to know these things. The custom-written song does set him apart, especially the way. Steve Dore’s “Critical to be Political” sings not only the praises of Ron, but of the whole social networking scene. Nice.

***

(Former) Gov. Mitt Romney, Massachusetts (R)
"The Official MySpace Page of Governor Mitt Romney"
Age: 60
Star sign: Pisces
Friend count: 24745
Comments: 3061

Best comment: “i wonder if ur elected if they'll let u take bodyguards to church lol.” – Josh [Summer Time!]

Interests: Lists a variety of country and folk music interests, as well as a cross section of books such as “Huckleberry Finn”: and “The Business Of Winning.” No movies or TV.

Other social network memberships:
YouTube
Facebook

The blocky design on this free MySpace profile (Paid for by Romney for President Inc.) is an amateurish mish-mash of blue, red, gray and gold that just gets messier the further you scroll down. Active bloggers include Mitt and his sons. Mitt sets himself apart from stodgier opponents by including Elvis Presley’s “A Little Less” (DJ remix) as his profile jam.

Helen: I like how Mitt’s first video welcomes voters to his MySpace profile and …OMG! The blinking icon says Mitt’s “Online Now!” Is it Mitt! Or is it one of his many sons – who, incidentally, are all featured as Mitt’s top friends. And somehow, despite the design disaster, Mitt’s profile still manages to project Mitt as a homey, outdoorsy, charming, family guy. Who doesn’t go to the movies or watch TV.

Ree: I can tell from his friend list that the Mitt Romney cloning experiment was a huge success. His kids look way too much like him for me to view this profile objectively. I’m just going to call them “Clones 1-3,” “Beard variant” and “Oops.” I’m serious. In fact, I doubt his wife’s DNA factored in at all.

***

Rep. Tom Tancredo, Colorado (R)
"Official MySpace of Congressman Tom Tancredo"
Age: 61
Star sign: Sagittarius
Friend count: 2,476
Comments: 478
Best comment: “tom 4 prez!!!!!!!!!1” -- John litshitski

Interests: Lots.

Other social network memberships:
None

This nondescript profile on default template offers little to interest the eye other than a scrolling appearance calendar, a couple of videos and a link to Tom’s blog on another site. On the plus side, Tom diligently offers his many interests which include “politics, hunting, playing with my 5 grandchildren, riding my Harley.” (click on ‘’pics” to see a photo of Tom doing the last item). His “About me” section is another plus, written first person in three well-contained paragraphs.

Helen: I like how this guy doesn’t abuse the “About me” section, though visually there just isn’t much that makes me want to stick around. His movie interests are the most interesting thing here — a cross-section of military thrillers (both “Bourne” movies), old school westerns (“Rio Bravo,” “She Wore a Yellow Ribbon,” and middle-brow comedies (“Trains, Planes & Automobiles,” National Lampoon’s “Vacation” movies), and Sherlock Holmes!

Ree: Voters, please take special note that it is in fact the film version of the world’s greatest detective that Tom prefers – the anachronistic, Basil Rathbone, Nazi-fighting Holmes, the one who makes those long speeches about a cold wind blowing from the east. The creepy, smack-junkie, literary-hero Holmes would never vote Republican.

***

Actor and (Former) Sen. Fred Dalton Thompson, Tennessee (R)
[Couldn’t be bothered to enter a MySpace headline.]
Age: 64
Star sign: Leo
Friend count: 600 (Including Default Tom!)
Comments: 50

Best comment: “Mr. Thompson is the man!” -- Jimbo

Interests: None at all.

Other social network memberships:
None (He’s not even trying.)

Granted, this barebones profile is fairly new, but the most interesting thing going on here is the banner link to Fred’s main site “I’m With Fred.” Good thing “Fred” is such an excellent name. Hopefully we can look forward to a beefier profile as the race progresses. And better friends. Fred’s current MySpace friends are flat-out boring.

Ree: What’s with the weird floating head portrait? Not to mention freakish tan — which is either indicative of a lifetime inhabiting the surface of the sun or is simply a fine patina of cigar-derived nicotine. Either way, ew. And that friend count is embarrassing for a candidate, let alone an actor on one of the longest running crime show franchises ever. .

Helen: Frankly, I’m somewhat disappointed with the fact that his “Law & Order” counterpart, DA Arthur Branch, writes in his MySpace blog more than Fred does. What’s more, adding Sam McCoy to his friends would boost his cred. Fred should play up his his strong points, too. At a monstrous 6’5”, he’s well equipped to deal with any Godzilla invasions that our country may face.

***

(Former) Gov. Tommy Thompson, Wisconsin (R)
"Visit www.tommy2008.com"
Age: 65
Star sign: [Apparently above such nonsense.]
Friend count: 5,058
Comments: 352

Best comments: “if you put me on your top 8 i'll try to get as many as possible to vote for you. i [heart] your name.” — omg! it piff!

Interests: He’s very interested in his YouTube videos.

Other social network memberships:
Flickr

Possibly the sloppiest page from the Republican Party, this profile features the standard flag template and text and video boxes blown out across the page and no negative space to give the eyes a rest from his faded glory. Tommy’s blog is limited to third party entries and media quotes, and he’s including no information about his “interests.”

Helen: Ugh. What a mess. The only way to save this profile would be to throw in some dancing hamsters or maybe a couple of twirling Jesuses. Or a photo of Tommy in a cheese hat. He’s from Wisconsin, he should be wearing a cheese hat. People love cheese hats!

Ree: You’re right, no cheese hat portraits. Instead, Tommy’s pictures are full of shots from the same day, at the same speech, in front of the same podium: “This is what I look like making a hand gesture,” “Here’s me using the other hand,” and “Look, I’m sucking in my gut in this one.” Yawn. Nice blue suit, though.

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