John McClane — American hero

And the rest
Of course the sequels began to take away the things that made “Die Hard” fun.

First, they aren’t even “‘Die Hard’ in a...” movies since John McClane is never trapped in a small enclosed space. In the second film he’s got the run of Dulles Airport and its D.C. environs. In the third film he’s racing all over New York and Canada. You lose focus and intimacy this way: the sense that hero and villain are right next to each other, breathing down each other’s necks.

I guess they had to give back his shoes (it would’ve looked silly if he kept losing them), but did they have to give back Rick Blaine? In “Die Hard 2,” McClane isn’t the reluctant hero; he’s the guy who rushes in. Look, those guys pushed that suitcase under the table. I guess I’ll follow them.

He’s still surrounded by superincompetents (Dennis Franz, et al.), but for the requisite face-to-face with the villains the film relies on fantastic coincidences (McClane bumping into Col. Stuart at the airport) and inconceivable betrayals (Major Grant). Plus every time he’s ready to step down, Barnes (Art Evans) tells McClane — rather than, say, anyone in authority — the specialized information to get near the bad guys. Once more into the breach, dear friends. That’s Henry V, not Rick Blaine. Don’t even get me started on the snowmobile chase.

In the third film, “Die Hard with a Vengeance,” McClane also loses the Will Kane connection. He’s no longer the lone gunman trapped between two groups. For the first time we see him with his group, New York cops, and they’re a pretty smart, cynical bunch. It seems more realistic, less cartoonish, but it leaves him with just one cinematic role model: Rocky. Maybe that’s why the film feels punchdrunk.

The betrayals become more inconceivable. Holly leaves him again? After he saved her life twice? Makes you wonder what a guy’s gotta do to keep a girl.

The coincidences become more fantastic. OK, so the villains flood the tunnel where McClane is driving the gold-laden truck and he climbs on top of the truck and grabs onto a ladder that leads to the surface, but is pushed by the water, geyser-like, up the shaft and into the middle of a park, and isn’t killed or even seriously injured. Sure, why not? It’s an action movie. But his partner, Zeus (Sam Jackson), just happens to be driving by at that very second?

Don’t even get me started on the clue on the bottom of the bottle of aspirin.

Post-9/11
So will “Live Free or Die Hard,” the first post-9/11 “Die Hard,” get us back on the right track? There’s a few good signs anyway.

In Entertainment Weekly, director Len Wiseman talks of demanding a script change: from a John McClane who says “What can I do to help?” to one who asks himself “Why the hell do I have to be here?” So maybe the Rick Blaine element will return.

Then the writers took Johnny-boy away from all those smart, cynical cops in New York and stuck him in the Dept. of Homeland Security. What better way to surround him with superincompetents? So maybe the Will Kane element will return.

Besides, as Guyz Nite’s excellent “Die Hard” video on YouTube tells us:

We know what the basic gist is
There ain’t no Allen and it’s not Christmas
We don’t know but we’re pretty sure that
John McClane kicks assssss!

Yippee-ki-yay, indeed.

The second-best thing Erik Lundegaard has seen on YouTube is Guyz Nite’s “Die Hard” video. He can be reached at: .

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