Hollywood ‘Idol’ moves at lightning speed

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Simon says
Sometimes the best part of “American Idol” is the latest sly comment from acerbic judge Simon Cowell. Here are some of our favorites from this season.

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Even the picture of her husband serving in Baghdad couldn’t save Army reservist Rachel Jenkins. Ashlyn Carr got two chances in San Antonio, but the third performance before the judges failed to charm in Hollywood. Porcelana Patino trained like Rocky and made it out of New York, but faltered in the sequel. Teenage runaway Sarah Burgess went out as well, but said her parents were proud anyway, so she was already a winner.

The guys had a little more wiggle room, but not enough for the likable but overmatched Jarrod Fowler, who couldn’t parlay his USS Reagan Idol title into the big time. But only 23 other men were cut, with 34 making it to groups.

Dysfunctional groups
Others had problems in groups, whether because of lyric malfunctions, team dynamics or judicial capriciousness. But time constraints meant only a few got their troubles immortalized on national television.

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Matt Sato, a 16-year-old who mentioned his up-and-down relationship with his mother every time the “Idol” cameras caught him, finally ran out of good fortune when he forgot his lyrics.

Perla Meneses sang “Hips Don’t Lie” and shook her groove thang enough to make it out of the first day, but Simon waned her that she was more personality than talent. That became painfully true in the group sing, when she was a fish out of water in a foursome with Glocksen, Jessica Gordon and Marisa Rhodes. Meneses got cut, everyone else advanced.

Most of the 36 eliminated at the group stage, however, didn’t even get to hear themselves screw up during Tuesday’s broadcast. Apparently in “American Idol’s” sixth season, there’s no time to cry over spilt lyrics.

Craig Berman is a writer in Washington, D.C.

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