Readers clash over online exhibitionism

Harmless fun that will eventually cause sex to be so mainstream, people will actually start paying attention to real-world issues.
Anonymous

I think it's fine as long as you aren't hurting anyone ... or sneaking around on a spouse or lover, such as Don is. That really isn't fair to his wife. If they were both doing it and it worked for them that way then fine ... It should be fun for everyone and not a hidden secret ... especially from people we're supposed to care about. I hope she finds out. Don sounds like a dirty old man. The other two were going about it the right way ... they weren't hurting anyone.
Anonymous, Canada

In theory, I see nothing wrong with it as long as it is kept between consenting adults. But I have a close online friend (who very well could be Don using a pseudonym) whom I know is very addicted to this lifestyle. I believe his compulsion affects his ability to have a normal life, fulfilling relationships and even friendships. Despite the anonymity afforded on the Web, the secretive nature of these sexual practices causes people to become devious and dishonest even with those not involved in their predilections. Though he would like me to be, I've never been an "audience" for [my online friend]. I met him on a Web site unrelated to his hobby, and he's never pushed me. But I worry that he will never find true happiness for himself, and feel sometimes that he objectifies himself and exploits himself when he has so much more to offer than just body parts. He's an amazing person with an incredible mind, and it hurts me to think this is all there is for him.
April, Boston

I think this is a VERY healthy and natural release and expression ... the only thing "wrong" with it is that many people have to lie and hide this beautiful side of themselves to the degree that living in an outwardly puritan society "demands."
Robert, Asheville, N.C.

I find this use of our awesome technology simply gross. Don stating that "there is this secret side to me that must be satisfied" is simply lack of self-control. Our culture has taken a turn for the worse and the belief that all desires must be fulfilled and not shamed is to blame. Susan describing herself a "church-goer" but acting on the desire to have skin-on-skin contact with numerous partners is an embarrassment to the rest of us who PRACTICE our religion, and part of that is treating our bodies with the respect they were created for. We are not animals and when we start putting so much thought and energy into filling our desires we take away time and energy that could be used for other good. How hurt and disgusted would Don's wife and kids be if they found out this was what he was doing on business trips? At the cost of your children's respect, Don, do you HAVE to fulfill these desires? They will find out, people always get caught.
Sarah, Lynden, Wash.

Being a regular Voyeurweb contributor myself, I happen to think that it's harmless adult fun for couples (my husband and I do) or singles. It's also a great way to meet friends that are little more open-minded than most people and aren't afraid to show or tell you what they think.
Joliesse, Va.

I think that, for the most part, it's harmless fun. The downside is that it can become an addiction. Not such a bad thing for a single person, but for a married person with kids the addiction can ruin a family. When you would rather sit in front of a computer monitor than interact with your spouse and children, that's a problem.
Tony, Prescott, Ariz.

It seems like a fairly safe way to experience what many would find offensive. In the privacy of your own home you should be able to do what you please. Personally I want to focus all of my sexual energy on my wife, so I've lost touch with porn and the Net. I used to be somewhat addicted and admit it still beckons me. (Hence why this article jumped at me.) If my wife (of three months) would ever like to surf with me I could get back into it quickly. But only if we do it together.
Anonymous

I think that online exhibitionism allows us shy and reserved people to live out a fantasy that we cannot in real life. It is also very safe for us married people that still want to be faithful. You get the excitement and something different and still afterwards get to make love to your wife without guilt.
Barry, Memphis, Tenn.

Love the thought, though I would never have what it take to do it.
Thomas, Plains, Pa.

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