Can Lindsay Lohan change her luck?

Once upon a time, there was a precocious little girl from Long Island. She had long red hair, adorable little freckles, a contract with Ford Models and a career as an up-and-coming child actor. True, daddy was in prison for securities fraud. True, mom did spend a chunk of that “Parent Trap” money on tanning salon and Virginia Slims. Still, from an early age the stars seemed aligned in Lindsay Lohan’s favor.

Then Lindsay grew up a bit. Instead of being condemned to the grim life of a formerly-cute-child-star, her good fortune just seemed to improve. She starred in meatier and meatier teen roles — “Freaky Friday,” “Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen,” and then  “Mean Girls,” the breakout role. How I loved “Mean Girls.” I wanted Lindsay’s home-schooled Skipper to usurp Rachel McAdams’ Barbie. I rooted for her with the kind of enthusiasm most people reserve for horse races and presidential elections.  

Roger Ebert liked Lindsay too. He even compared her to Jodie Foster for her “seriousness and intense focus.” Not too shabby. The tabloids weren’t so harsh at the time. They called her a “curvy vixen,” (and not in the euphemistic way often applied to Mariah Carey). Back then, the most salacious rumor about Lindsay was that she’d had some surgical enhancement.  Frankly, this is a rumor some of us spend a lifetime trying to plant. Yes, despite some minor stumbling blocks, Lindsay was very lucky indeed.

Lohan loses focus
Of course, we all know where the story goes from here.  Just when it seemed like Lindsay had the world on a string, her career took a turn away from Jodie Fosterville and started careening down a dark trash-strewn road to Denise Richardstown.  It wasn’t only the extracurricular shenanigans — let she among us who has not taken a drunken spill down Bryan Adams’ stairs be the first to condemn. It was the projects. We knew Lindsay could do better.  First, there was “Herbie: Fully Loaded.” Then there was Lindsay looking a little loaded herself, and phoning in some of the most half-hearted publicity appearances in Disney movie history. Seriously, Lindsay, don’t just stand there. Put your arm around that lovably sentient car. Pretend that you like each other. 

NBC VIDEO Lohan on her new films May 8: "Today" show host Matt Lauer talks with Lindsay Lohan about her two new movies "Just My Luck" and "Prairie Home Companion." Today Show Entertainment

While America was still reeling from “Herbie,” Lindsay released her debut album, “Speak.” It was filled with songs about just wanting to be “left alone” to “dance” and “have fun,” lyrics that sounded like they had been cranked out of the “celebutante side project” machine.  Lindsay’s breakup with Wilmer Valderrama was also no picnic. While it was endearing to see Lindsay so unabashedly heartbroken, spilling her guts to every reporter who would listen, it was also sad — like watching a friend cry and binge eat over the departure of a clear good-for-nothing. Again, we knew Lindsay could do better.

Sadly, in the two years since Lindsay starred in “Mean Girls” she has become less of an emerging talent, and more of an over-hyped personality. She’s now grouped with the same cadre of celebrities who are famous for being famous. In interviews she complains that her tabloid coverage and “party-girl” image have cost her opportunities to work with serious directors. She may be right.  These days, the Roger Ebert precocious young actress award goes to Scarlett Johansson.

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