Michael's mission

Michael describes his being back in front of the cameras on “Boston Legal” like being a right-handed painter forced to paint left-handed.

Katie Couric, NBC News: What did you mean by that exactly?

Michael J. Fox: Well, when I’m acting, you know that we shoot scenes—we shoot a master and then we shoot a close up and then we’ll shoot a two shot or whatever.  So actually what you see isn’t all happening at once.  It’s a series of separate events that are edited together.

Couric: Right.

Michael J. Fox: So if I do something in the master, I don’t when I get around to my close up if I’m gonna be able to do that.

Couric: Right.

Michael J. Fox: So I have to do this kind of redactive choice making.  But actually the thing that happens that’s really cool,  that I really pleased with, was it makes me a better actor. It makes me simpler.  So the metaphor of painting left-handed and right-handed is it’s not ideal and not what I choose to do... but I’m still painting. 

The average person with Parkinson’s might take as many as 19 pills a day.  Michael says he’s lucky— he only takes five.  One of them is called Levadopa, which remains the gold standard for treating the symptoms of P.D.  But it has a noticeable side effect, called dyskenisia.

Michael J. Fox: A lot of times when people see me—like right now, the things that they’re noticing are not strictly speaking the symptoms of Parkinson’s.  They’re the symptoms of the medication that I take.  Which is that, you know, the kind of rocking movement.

A typical day can be fraught with harrowing extremes.  Michael says his challenge is navigating the passage between “on” and “off”. 

Couric: ‘Off times’ is when the—

Michael J. Fox: When—

Couric: The medication isn’t working, right?

Michael J. Fox: Yeah.  But you know, sometimes when it’s like that, I kind of like it, if I don’t have anything to do.  I’m just around the house.  I like to let it go where it’s gonna go.  And I don’t know -- just to see what it is,  to let it go.  You know because I feel safe.  I feel safe in my home.  I feel safe with my kids, with Tracy.  I feel safe with who I am.  So it’s good for you to hand check that and just see it.  See what they’re bringing.

Though “Boston Legal” has expressed interest in bringing Michael back, he’s not considering any permanent return to acting.  When he’s not wearing his crusader’s cap, Michael’s favorite role now is playing dad.  With their oldest son turning 17 in May, and three daughters ranging from 4 to 11, Michael and his wife, Tracy Pollan, have their hands full in more ways than one.

Michael J. Fox:  I was already starting learn when my daughters were born that what is perceived as a loss was actually just things that were being cleared off the deck.  And other things were filling those holes.  And what was filling those holes was just much better, much bigger.  And much more—it was just more powerful than what I was losing.  What I was losing was a lot of superficial stuff.  And what I was gaining was a lot of deep important stuff and knowledge and understanding, compassion.  And I think humility.  And just good stuff. 

And Michael says when it comes to his kids, Parkinson’s is not the elephant in the room. 

Couric:  How do they handle this?

Michael J. Fox: I don’t know that they even really notice, I mean, in a way.  They’re so patient with some things.  You know?  Like if one of them needs a spoonful of cough medicine or something, they’ll say like, “No.  Dad, you’re not doing that.” You know and it’s very open in our house about it.  We don’t talk about it a lot, but we don’t not talk about it.

Michael says his family will always be his number one priority. But he knows he’s got another family depending on him too.  And the actor turned activist now sees himself as part of the greatest ensemble he’s ever had the privilege of working with. 

Michael J. Fox:  At some point I realized this isn’t just about me. So when I get an opportunity to meet with people, I take it. But that camaraderie and understanding and empathy is really great.  And also I see that people have invested a lot of hope what I’m doing.  And I want to honor that and I want to respect it. And I see such courage. There’s an urgency but there’s also strength that I prefer to it as urgency and not desperation because too strong to be desperate.  They’re urgent.  They adamant and they’re committed and they’re hopeful.

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