Perils of watching movies with my mother

And Todd Solondz shall lift you up on eagles’ wings
I’m not the only one who’s been traumatized by my mother’s zealous pursuit of provocative cinema. One time when I was living in Seattle she called and asked what I’d seen lately. I told her that the new Todd Solondz was interesting. The following week she told me, “You know, Adam, I really enjoyed that movie you recommended, but no one from my gospel choir did.”

After I picked up the phone and stopped hyperventilating I said, “What?! You took your gospel friends to that? Are you a crazy person?”

“You said it was good so we went after rehearsal.”

The movie was “Happiness.” You know, the one that gives a rather sympathetic portrayal of a pedophile. I can only imagine the cries of “oh sweet Jesus!” that went up in that theatre.

This is just how my mother is. She means no harm. And she’s no vulgarian. She is just so completely comfortable in her own skin and so open to new experiences that shocking art doesn’t shock her. It just interests her. She doesn’t like everything she sees — she thought Solondz’s latest film, “Palindromes,” was bleak and inaccessible — but she’s not afraid of new thinking. She’s vivacious and curious and funny and in many ways larger than life. She’s a female Mrs. Doubtfire.

And for every awkward cinematic experience she has initiated she gets credit for plenty of enriching ones. Like the time when I was eight when she took me to “Breaking Away,” the biking movie about a dreamer who doesn’t quite live in reality (I can’t imagine how she thought I’d relate to that). Or when she sent me a chapter of Madelon Sprengnether’s book “Crying at the Movies” so I could better understand the nature of films as memory triggers. Or whenever she leaves a long, excitable message on my machine about something she just saw (the one for “Malcolm X” topped two minutes). She has taught me that life can be made richer through the exploration of unique and challenging cinema. And it has been.

Still, I’m steeling myself for Mother’s Day. It’s her choice and that can mean anything. I’ll do my duty: I’ll pick her up, buy the tickets, lay our coats over two good seats as we get popcorn. It’ll be the two of us in a movie theatre and that’ll make her happy. I’ll be happy too.

But if I see a preview for “Spanking the Monkey II” I’m out of there. 

Adam Wahlberg is the executive editor of Minnesota Law & Politics (“Only Our Name Is Boring”). He can be reached at .

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