Simple advice for ‘Real Moms’

Are You Ready to Make a Change?
Here are a few more questions to help you realize it’s time to get your family out of the fast lane — to slow down and make a few different parenting choices so that your kids will be happier and more confident, develop stronger values, and become self-reliant. Do any of these ring true for you or your family?

• Do you feel guilty about not living up to your own image of the perfect mom? Do you second-guess your mothering or think you’re not doing a good-enough job?
• Do you worry about your child — about whether the workload and schedule is too much?
• At your parent-teacher conference, do you find yourself asking more about your kid’s grade and how he’s competing with the rest of the class than about whether he is happy and how he gets along?
• Are you frequently stressed or exhausted or impatient with your family? Does the littlest, tiniest thing get under your skin? Are you quick to anger? Are you yelling more?
• Are you on the coach’s case complaining that your child isn’t getting enough game time or respect on the team?
• Has success become such a huge commodity in your family that your kids are afraid to let you down or disappoint you with a poor grade?
• Do you worry that your kid seems really anxious or depressed? That she’s not having any fun?
• Do you worry when your kid seems to have nothing to do, and feel as though you have to educate or entertain him every second of the day?
• Do you always compare yourself frequently to other mothers and worry that they’re doing a better job than you are?

If you answered yes to any of the questions, it’s time to make some changes for your kids, yourself, and your family. And this book will help you. We’ll work on simple changes so that you stop trying to do it all and instead focus on what really matters in giving your kid what she needs to be happy and successful on her own.

Yes, it will involve a little work — but we’re talking about simple changes. I’ll show you how to make easy adjustments that can have a dramatic impact on your family. And if you stick to your commitment and do make those changes, you will be happier and more content in your mothering, and your children will have a much better chance of being successful not only in school but also in life. And that’s because you’ll be raising your kids so they can survive and thrive without you.

Excerpted from “12 Simple Secrets Real Moms Know,” by Michele Borba. Copyright © 2006 by Michele Borba. Excerpted by permission of John Wiley & Sons, Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.

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