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Nov. 30, 2005 | 7:13 p.m. ET
Why no prenup for Nick and Jessica? (Dan Abrams)
Who would have thought it would take the breakup of Nick and Jessica for me to do a closing about prenuptial agreements?
Call me an unromantic pessimist. Criticize me for being too pragmatic, and believing that you shouldn't let love interfere with making a wise business decision. But I say if you have got some cash or may get some, do it do it do it. It will simply be a worthless piece of paper if it all works out. I promise only a tiny percentage of the 38 percent of marriages that fail predict doom at the outset.
So why didn't Jessica Simpson insist that Nick Lachey sign a prenuptial agreement? She apparently thought a prenup wasn't romantic and it was antithetical to her religious upbringing. OK, well now under California law, he is entitled to half of their "community property" — that is, the combined total of what the two of them have earned since they got married. And, since the couple's nuptials back in October 2002, Jessica has brought home a lot more bacon than former boy band member Nick.
We buy car insurance not because we want to get in an accident but because we just might. We write wills not because we expect to die soon, but because who knows what' s going to happen tomorrow. And we should sign prenups not because we don't expect to live happily ever after, but because the odds say it may not work out
Let me put this into Jessica’s terms. You thought buffalo wings were made of buffalo. Well, a celebrity marriage without a prenup is kind of like well, a fake Louis Vuitton bag. It looks great when you buy it, but without that Louis Vuitton warranty, there's nothing to protect you when it just falls apart.
Nick really was the smart one. Back when the two tied the knot in 2002, he was actually the bigger star, the lead singer of 98 Degrees, and a couple of the boy band's albums had just gone platinum. Jessica hadn't come close to making the kind of money her contemporaries Britney Spears and Christina Aguillera were pulling in. When asked about it back then, Nick laughed and told a reporter, "I didn't want to do one, because I know she'll end up making more money than me."
Nice. Well, maybe Nick will be noble and let Jessica keep her earnings from everything from the Dukes of Hazzard movie to her own line of sweet-scented body creams. But if he does not, well then Jessica has paid a pretty hefty price for loving Nick. But as Jessica herself sings, her boots are made for walking. Something tells me that even after paying Nick off, Jessica still might have enough cash left over to make sure that those boots are Gucci boots.
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