Airline coffee: a bitter cup, indeed

By James Wysong

Travel columnist

updated 3:26 p.m. ET May 31, 2006

Java, Joe, morning juice, black gold, an ex-junkie’s last vice — whatever you want to call it, coffee has a firm grip on this country’s morning routine. The proof is in the long lines at the airport coffee stands every morning.

Coffee is served on airplanes, too, and it might even be supplied by that familiar purveyor of gourmet coffee from Seattle. Yet, sad to say, when you start to sip this coffee on an airplane, the only special taste you experience is that of a compost heap. How is it possible to screw up a cup of coffee so badly? I have several theories, all grounds for consideration.

1. If the coffee is bad, you won’t want a second cup. I’m not saying that all flight attendants are looking to lighten their load, but if the plane is oversold and understaffed, the last thing the flight attendant wants is extra requests for coffee. So, it’s possible your crew is not being especially careful about making good coffee and keeping it fresh. In fact, I see this kind of “benign neglect” all the time.

2. If the coffee is bad, folks will buy more at the airport. Here’s an interesting coincidence: The coffee you drink on the plane is often supplied by the same company that sells it to you in the airport terminal for $5 dollars a shot. Call me a conspiracy theorist, but if they sell an inferior blend to the airlines, then travelers might buy a cup in the terminal instead. Seattle gets the money both ways. Sounds like a brilliant business model to me.

3. It’s all in the H2O. Many people believe that bad coffee comes from bad water, and they might be right. It is certainly true that airplane water doesn’t taste all that great. It is, after all, from the local municipal water supply, and it’s been sitting in the plane’s water tank for a while. Bottled water makes much better coffee. If you don’t believe me, next time you’re in a hotel, pour bottled water into your room’s coffeemaker. Even those wretched hotel coffee packets can turn out decent coffee if the water is good.

4. You’re drinking decaf — whether you want it or not. Many flight attendants brew only decaffeinated coffee. Are they concerned about your jangled nerves? Not particularly. It’s just that they’d rather have sleeping passengers than a hyperactive crowd any day. I am not condoning it; I’m just saying it happens. Did you know that airline coffee used to be 90% caffeine-free anyway? And did you know that a few airlines still serve mostly decaffeinated coffee as a matter of course?

5. The water’s not hot enough. Some people say that airline coffee is bland because the water doesn’t get hot enough to steep the coffee properly. This theory doesn’t make much sense to me, as I have been scalded by hot water plenty of times when I’ve been working in the galley.

Whatever the reason, most airplane coffee is pretty awful. So, what can you do about it? Here are some tips.

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