Fearless Grammy predictions

Rap album
“Be,” Common
“The Cookbook,” Missy Elliott
“Encore,” Eminem
“The Massacre,” 50 Cent
“Late Registration,” Kanye West

Helen: “Late Registration,” please. West is the smartest thing to happen in Rap since Eminem, who’s also up this year. But “Encore” is greatest hits, and while it’s full of great hits, awards should be for new stuff. Common is interesting, but his R&B raps (such as “Go” featuring West) are dull. Missy Elliott is always great, but this LP isn’t better than “Late Registration.” As for Fiddy, I already mentioned my disregard for its hit, “Candy Shop.”

Ree: How come lyrical skills go out the window when hardcore rappers start making the big money jams? Take 50 Cent: “I’ll let you lick my lollipop…” If you listen closely, you can hear the whole studio cough. “Late Registration” may be a bit pop for this category (I’ll take my rap sans string section, thanks), but West should take this hands down. That is, unless the judges know a good Sugarhill Gang jam when they hear it, and give Missy the bumpin’ dance floor nod.

Rock album
“X&Y,” Coldplay
“In Your Honor,” Foo Fighters
“A Bigger Bang,” The Rolling Stones
“How To Dismantle An Atomic Bomb,” U2
“Prairie Wind,” Neil Young

Helen: Oh just give it to Neil Young. Coldplay and U2 are practically the same band. (And how is it that Coldplay spent a couple of winning years in Grammy’s Alternative category but are now considered Rock?) Foo Fighters continue to be a respectable rock outfit — but not terribly interesting. As for the Stones, I know a contract with the devil when I see one. Meanwhile, “Prairie Wind” is the best Young LP in over a decade.

Ree: Arrghhhh! What’s going on with rock this year? Good bands nominated, but none of them at the height of their game … except maybe Coldplay. “X & Y” may be the band’s best, but the Kraftwerk stylin’ on this LP isn’t rock with a capital “r”. For the rest of the bands, just change the albums nominated. Let’s have “Foo Fighters” for Foo Fighters, “Beggars Banquet” for the Stones, “Unforgettable Fire” for U2 and “Harvest Moon” for Neil. And the winner is? The Stones, of course. It’s no contest, and I’m not even a big fan. Too bad this category isn’t retroactive.

Country album
“Fireflies,” Faith Hill
“Lonely Runs Both Ways,” Alison Krauss And Union Station
“Time Well Wasted,” Brad Paisley
“All Jacked Up,” Gretchen Wilson
“Jasper County,” Trisha Yearwood

Helen: Check out Brad Paisley, lost in a sea of female nominees. Plus, he looks kind of like Jordan Catalano from “My So-Called Life.” But that’s not why he should win. He’s with some strong contenders, and the Grammy probably goes to America’s Sweetheart, Faith Hill. Still, this kid is like a young George Strait, and “Time Well Wasted” is his most solid LP yet. Paisley’s lyrics are smart, but not annoyingly literate. He can also be clever without being trite, in both words and music. Hopefully we’ll see Paisley in this category for many years to come.

Ree: Insert “Brokeback Mountain” cowboy joke here.

Ree Hines and Helen A.S. Popkin dedicate this year’s fearless Grammy picks to Ree’s mom, Monti, who’s watching the show this year from the skybox with her perennial Grammy pick, Elvis Presley.

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